Andres
Puritan Board Doctor
My wife and I need some impartial, third-party mediators to help us make a decision regarding the upcoming holidays. (P.S. I checked with my wife and she approved this posting) This is our first holidays as a married couple, so we are struggling how to make it fair for everyone. Here is our situation:
My wife has family (parents, adult brother, grandparents) that live 3 hours away from us. My family (mom, adult brothers, sister and her husband and new baby) live here in town where we live.
My wife works the day before and day after Thanksgiving and I work before, on, and after Thanksgiving, so us traveling to her family house is out of the question for Thanksgiving, thus we will be spending that holiday here with my family. Plus, my in-laws do not cook for Thanksgiving, so the holiday is not as big for them as it for my family. The weekend after Thanksgiving my wife will travel home alone to see her family but I have to work so I will stay behind.
Now on to Christmas…
I am off that whole week, but my wife is only off Christmas eve and Christmas day. She has to work at 8:00 Dec 26th. We have already decided we will travel to see my in-laws when my wife gets off work Wednesday evening. We would then spend Christmas eve all day with her family, but I want to be back on Christmas morning to open gifts with my family. Is this unfair of me to ask my wife to miss Christmas day with her family? How do we compromise spending the Christmas holidays between both families? Thanks for your wisdom, especially those who are married and have dealt specifically with this.
My wife has family (parents, adult brother, grandparents) that live 3 hours away from us. My family (mom, adult brothers, sister and her husband and new baby) live here in town where we live.
My wife works the day before and day after Thanksgiving and I work before, on, and after Thanksgiving, so us traveling to her family house is out of the question for Thanksgiving, thus we will be spending that holiday here with my family. Plus, my in-laws do not cook for Thanksgiving, so the holiday is not as big for them as it for my family. The weekend after Thanksgiving my wife will travel home alone to see her family but I have to work so I will stay behind.
Now on to Christmas…
I am off that whole week, but my wife is only off Christmas eve and Christmas day. She has to work at 8:00 Dec 26th. We have already decided we will travel to see my in-laws when my wife gets off work Wednesday evening. We would then spend Christmas eve all day with her family, but I want to be back on Christmas morning to open gifts with my family. Is this unfair of me to ask my wife to miss Christmas day with her family? How do we compromise spending the Christmas holidays between both families? Thanks for your wisdom, especially those who are married and have dealt specifically with this.