arapahoepark
Puritan Board Professor
What are your thoughts? Has technology wrought this? Hook up culture? Shallower people?
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What are your thoughts? Has technology wrought this? Hook up culture? Shallower people?
I'd be interested to know more. I suspect it is because, in trying to be respectful, we do not want to be seen both desperate, creepy or perverted as nearly all unbelievers of my generation are.I'm not sure I'd make a universal statement as such. For what it's worth, in my (limited) experience, Christian men tend to be a little more sheepish around Christian women compared to non-believing men in the same situation with non-believing women.
I don't generally hear this sentiment from Christian women. It's usually more to the effect of, "why aren't the men of the church approaching me?"
I know there are far more factors in place that condition this (social media, sexual proliferation, online dating, etc.), but that's my humble opinion.
Interesting. Makes sense. Having tried online dating in the past, I came to the conclusion everyone on there is shallow. Even as an introvert, it is worse than anything.I have one hypothesis that may partially explain this. With the proliferation of sexual impulses all over the internet/media, emphasis on “glamour shots” that accentuate personal beauty, and general networking in which people are flooded with potential candidates, it’s tougher for people to decide on, land, and be content with significant others.
Yes online dating can help, but I think it’s buffet style approach can almost be self defeating.
I have one hypothesis that may partially explain this. With the proliferation of sexual impulses all over the internet/media, emphasis on “glamour shots” that accentuate personal beauty, and general networking in which people are flooded with potential candidates, it’s tougher for people to decide on, land, and be content with significant others.
Yes online dating can help, but I think it’s buffet style approach can almost be self defeating.
You make a good point. Western culture is generally anti-commitment which influences our view of marriage. Another problem is the skin-deep nature of online dating. Some have already pointed this out, but you only have a few statements(that they have written about themselves) and a picture. So as with standard dating, it still has problems.The other negative is that many people are not marrying anymore or are divorced after only a few short years of marriage. Also, people have multiple partners with no firm commitment to any of them.
Either, I suppose since even Christians are following the ways of the world.Just to clarify, are you asking about Christian spouses, or spouses in general?
Yes to both.Its just that your question assumes the case. I am 25 years removed from the dating scene. Is it common knowledge among Millennials that it is harder to find spouses? Has there been a decline in marriages?
What are your thoughts? Has technology wrought this? Hook up culture? Shallower people?
Visitation rights?
I am thinking, largely, of the change within the past decade or two.I guess we have to consider what era you're comparing. Way back in history people didn't choose their spouses they were arranged. I think our perception of dating became a new concept in the 1800s and really took off in the early part of the 20th century.
I am thinking, largely, of the change within the past decade or two.
What are the benefits of marriage for modern unbelievers? Tax breaks? Visitation rights?
The military in particular is terribly influential with regards to this... so many young enlisted get married to get out of the barracks, receive additional family benefits and separation pay during deployment. The divorce rate is horrendous.A big one in the US is probably employer subsidized health care. The Supreme Court legislation in Obergefell pulled the teeth on the push to extend benefits to unmarried cohabitants. So if a couple is shacking up, and one has good employer subsidized health care, and the other is having to buy an inferior product in the marketplace, suddenly marriage can look more attractive.
Laws make marriage a risky proposition in the US for men and most Western women are not worth the risk and have been brainwashed to some degree by the culture. Many evangelical churches will blame it on men not "manning up" and marrying these deficient creatures, but our public schools have churned out entitled hypergamous princesses who can't cook or clean, milk a cow, or clean a chicken. And then of course, if a car loses half its value once you drive it off the lot once, what does this say about our current generation of women. 40% of children are born out of wedlock (for whites 29 percent; Hispanics, 53 percent; and blacks, 71 percent) and many have lived with others before marriage. I fear for my sons and may urge them to look eastward to more traditional cultures to avoid all this baggage.
There are still American Christian women who are godly, chaste, and desire to be wives and mothers. I know many women who fit this mold but are single. Why? Because godly men of character are not pursuing them. And I don’t say this to disparage Christian men. Instead, it seems that there is a shortage of single Reformed men (or perhaps it’s a surplus of single Reformed women, depending how you look at it). All this to say that your sons may not need to turn eastward to find worthy wives.