The Rod and Discipline
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panta dokimazete
Puritan Board Post-Graduate
I start spanking bottoms the first time they verbalize "NO" - I use a wide, light sawed off canoe paddle - looks and sounds intimidating - distributes the blow across a wide area - causes nothing but a red rump.
Scot
Puritan Board Sophomore
I believe that whatever age a child understands the word "no" they're old enough to discipline (this is much earlier than people think).
Personally, I use a small bamboo rod. It hardly takes any force at all to inflict pain to the backside.
Get the book "Shepherding A Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp.
Personally, I use a small bamboo rod. It hardly takes any force at all to inflict pain to the backside.
Get the book "Shepherding A Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp.
Gregory, this is not an answer to your question but allow me to wax anecdotal for a moment.
My daughter is seventeen. I have spanked her a total of three times in seventeen years. All three of those spankings occurred prior to her tenth birthday. Why so few times? I am not going to chalk it up superior parenting. But if my own observations have merit, allow me to share them.
1. A commitment to time
My wife modeled this behavior and I simply parroted it. Her instruction to Bethany was direct, loving and made understandable to her age. My wife knew that telling a two year old to do something once did not mean they would do it the second time. Young children learn by repetition and observation, not just based on what they are told.
2. Affection
On the surface this would seem obvious, but after observing parents and their children I have been shocked at how overlooked affection is. I had the 1:00 am feeding shift when Bethany was an infant. My wife had problems with breast feeding so I spelled her in the early morning and took the late shift. I learned how to cradle Bethany in my arms while warming her bottle, all the while talking to her and singing. I knew zoo about child rearing. All I knew is that I loved my baby girl with all my heart. I believe a connection was made between us even at her young age as she learned the nuances of my voice and how comforting I was to her.
3. Spanking as a final option
The bible clearly supports corporeal punishment. It is there as a means of brining a child to obedience. For me, spanking was a "last straw" option. I learned other ways to effect changes in Bethany's behavior. I would tell her how disappointed or angry I was at her behavior. I told her that God was equally angry with her sin and that it (her sin) was what Jesus died for in order to forgive. She has always had a tender heart and would be saddened quickly at the thought of an interrupted relationship with her earthly and her heavenly father. That worked the majority of the time, but not all the time. Like I said, I remember three times that I had to spank her. All three times was for willful disobedience that challenged our parental authority.
I am just relating my experience. It's anecdotal, so take it for what it's worth.
My daughter is seventeen. I have spanked her a total of three times in seventeen years. All three of those spankings occurred prior to her tenth birthday. Why so few times? I am not going to chalk it up superior parenting. But if my own observations have merit, allow me to share them.
1. A commitment to time
My wife modeled this behavior and I simply parroted it. Her instruction to Bethany was direct, loving and made understandable to her age. My wife knew that telling a two year old to do something once did not mean they would do it the second time. Young children learn by repetition and observation, not just based on what they are told.
2. Affection
On the surface this would seem obvious, but after observing parents and their children I have been shocked at how overlooked affection is. I had the 1:00 am feeding shift when Bethany was an infant. My wife had problems with breast feeding so I spelled her in the early morning and took the late shift. I learned how to cradle Bethany in my arms while warming her bottle, all the while talking to her and singing. I knew zoo about child rearing. All I knew is that I loved my baby girl with all my heart. I believe a connection was made between us even at her young age as she learned the nuances of my voice and how comforting I was to her.
3. Spanking as a final option
The bible clearly supports corporeal punishment. It is there as a means of brining a child to obedience. For me, spanking was a "last straw" option. I learned other ways to effect changes in Bethany's behavior. I would tell her how disappointed or angry I was at her behavior. I told her that God was equally angry with her sin and that it (her sin) was what Jesus died for in order to forgive. She has always had a tender heart and would be saddened quickly at the thought of an interrupted relationship with her earthly and her heavenly father. That worked the majority of the time, but not all the time. Like I said, I remember three times that I had to spank her. All three times was for willful disobedience that challenged our parental authority.
I am just relating my experience. It's anecdotal, so take it for what it's worth.
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