Samuel Rutherford has an interesting point to make, warning us thereby not to sin when we mourn.
ndeed it is self-love in us that maketh us mourn for them that die in the Lord. Why? Because for them we cannot mourn, since they are never happy till they be dead; therefore we mourn for our private respect. Take heed, then, that in showing your affection in mourning for your daughter, ye be not, out of self-affliction, mourning for yourself (Letters of Samuel Rutherford, p. 35).