If you're reading this, you've been LEFT BEHIND!

Discussion in 'Cults & World Religions' started by BobVigneault, Oct 21, 2011.

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  1. BobVigneault

    BobVigneault Bawberator Staff Member

    The RAPTURE has taken place!!! If you are reading this, the rapture has taken place and you've been LEFT BEHIND. Early this morning I placed a dead man's switch in my chair so that if my chair was suddenly EMPTY, it would trigger this message.

    If you are still here then go buy the Left Behind series and start reading it so you will know what to do. I thought that guy was full of horse apples up to his ears but I guess I was wrong. If anyone wants my iPhone and my lunch, just take it cuz I'M GONE!!!!
     
  2. BobVigneault

    BobVigneault Bawberator Staff Member

    Ooops. I had to run to the bathroom and I forgot to turn off my dead man's switch. Sorry for the false alarm. HEY! Who took my iPHONE? WHERE'S MY LUNCH???!!!
     
  3. GulfCoast Presbyterian

    GulfCoast Presbyterian Puritan Board Junior

    Thanks for the DVD's, too! :)
     
  4. BobVigneault

    BobVigneault Bawberator Staff Member

    MARK! BRING BACK MY JOYCE MEYER DVDs!!!!
     
  5. Stargazer65

    Stargazer65 Puritan Board Freshman

    :spitlol:
    I want your keyboard too, because I just spewed coffee all over mine!
     
  6. Edward

    Edward Puritan Board Doctor

    There wasn't an adjustment to allow for the change from the Julian to the Papist Gregorian calendar. There is still time for everyone to mail me the contents of their bank accounts and deeds to their property (No Detroit real estate, please).
     
  7. InSlaveryToChrist

    InSlaveryToChrist Puritan Board Junior

    Ahh, this made my day! :lol:
     
  8. Andres

    Andres Puritan Board Doctor

    There's no such thing as a free lunch (unless you steal Bob's). :wwbd:
     
  9. J. Dean

    J. Dean Puritan Board Junior

    Kirk Cameron? Is that you?
     
  10. yoyoceramic

    yoyoceramic Puritan Board Freshman

    I propose we rename the board now and require all users to subscribe to recommended reading:

    View attachment 2410
     
  11. Herald

    Herald Moderator Staff Member

    My eschatological position is post-Bawb.

    sent from my most excellent Motorola Atrix.
     
  12. Andres

    Andres Puritan Board Doctor

    With all due respect dear brother, a pre-Bawb position clearly makes more sense.
     
  13. jwithnell

    jwithnell Puritan Board Graduate

    Dibs on the cool shades!

    Just a check, but are we amils the only ones left?
     
  14. BobVigneault

    BobVigneault Bawberator Staff Member

    I'll try and get a head count. Could all you amils STOP MOVING, PLEASE?!
     
  15. Danny

    Danny Puritan Board Freshman

    Hey guys, they have the internet in heaven... have fun down there... :lol:
     
  16. Rich Koster

    Rich Koster Puritan Board Post-Graduate

    No passwords, open servers, I suppose :)
     
  17. "William The Baptist"

    "William The Baptist" Puritan Board Freshman

    :rofl:
     
  18. Bill The Baptist

    Bill The Baptist Puritan Board Senior

    And the Oscar for Best Actor goes to.....Kirk Cameron for Left Behind! Just kidding Kirk, sit your silly butt down.
     
  19. Herald

    Herald Moderator Staff Member

    I was thinking of going mid-Bawb but it would be too hard to explain.
     
  20. Marrow Man

    Marrow Man Drunk with Powder Staff Member

    I had to abandon the a-Bawb position because all of this talk about a dead man switch is just too pessimistic. A post-Bawb position clearly embraces the golden-age switch, which imho is the only truly biblical position.
     
  21. Theogenes

    Theogenes Puritan Board Junior

    LOL!
    Thankfully, Doc, if you missed the rapture, you can use your time machine and still make it. Back to the Past...or go Back to the Future and find out when it occurs and then set your watch alarm....
     
  22. DMcFadden

    DMcFadden Moderator Staff Member

    Bawb, does this mean that you want all of your Glenn Beck Goldline International gold coins back too? Because, since I lifted yours I feel as if I have experienced my own private rapture!
     
  23. NB3K

    NB3K Puritan Board Sophomore

    I was brought up in a penticostal church ie. Church of God denomination and they stressed that the Church will be raptured before the tribulation, but I feel that if there is a "rapture" it will be post-trib why? because it is a honor to suffer for the sake of Christ.

    Why does the charismatic church believe in a pre-trib rapture?
     
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