Heretics at the dinner table

[Santos]

Does 2John 1:10 Forbid allowing heretics into your home?
My brother in law has recently developed some very heretical views. He is supposed to be coming over on Thanksgiving with my sister and I am having second thoughts about having him over.

To be a little more specific, his most egregious offence is not just a denial of the Trinity, but calling it demonic.

I love my sister, but my personal conviction is that I should not invite him into my home.

 

[Ben_Leevey]

Brother, I would say, to my understanding, your conviction seems to be biblical.

 

[No Other Name]

Does 2John 1:10 Forbid allowing heretics into your home?
My brother in law has recently developed some very heretical views. He is supposed to be coming over on Thanksgiving with my sister and I am having second thoughts about having him over.

To be a little more specific, his most egregious offence is not just a denial of the Trinity, but calling it demonic.

I love my sister, but my personal conviction is that I should not invite him into my home.

From Van Neste's commentary on this verse: "Traveling teachers in the ancient world were able to do their work only as people took them into their homes, providing food and shelter. In 3 John, John encourages the church to provide this support for orthodox teachers, but here he tells Christians they must not support heretical teachers. The greeting prohibited here is not a casual “hello” but a Christian greeting that would denote acceptance and prayer for God’s blessing. This is not a call to be uncivil or rude; rather, it is a call for clarity as to who is, and who is not, recognized as a fellow Christian. To encourage or support false teachers is to participate in their “wicked works” of deceiving people, leading to their damnation."

 

[LightBringer]

Your convictions on this matter have a Biblical foundation.

Here are a few helpful verses on the topic on Heresy. A definition of heresy from 1 John 2:22
Who is the liar but he who denies that Jesus is the Christ? This is the antichrist, he who denies the Father and the Son. - ESV
anti-trinitarianism falls under this definition.
And from scripture what Paul's says what to do concerning heretics - 2 John 1:10
If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house or give him any greeting, - ESV

I do believe this conviction you are experiencing is from the Holy Spirit. One of His functions in the life of the Christian is to convict.

 

[cthorn14]

That's an uncomfortable situation. I think your application is reasonable.

Henry on the passage in question:

We may be sharers in the iniquities of others. How judicious and how cautious should the Christian be! There are many ways of sharing the guilt of other people's transgressions; it may be done by culpable silence, indolence, unconcernedness, private contribution, public countenance and assistance, inward approbation, open apology and defence. The Lord pardon our guilt of other persons' sins!

 

[MyCrows]

Rather than inviting him to a family gathering, and giving him a platform to speak his views to others, perhaps invite him to sit privately, and lovingly confront him with your concerns.

 

[Jack K]

Before you exclude someone from Thanksgiving dinner, make sure you have considered 2 John 10 in context. The topic at hand there is safeguarding the pure gospel and Christian love from heretical teaching. The point is to be sure not to give support, a platform, or a blessing to any person who is peddling heresy.

Does including your brother-in-law at Thanksgiving dinner support and bless heresy? That depends on the nature of your gathering and the intentions of the brother-in-law. If it is just a family gathering and the guy won't get any support for his heresy out of it (or might even be softened and turned), I think you may include him. But if being at Thanksgiving dinner will somehow aid or encourage him in spreading his heresy, you should protect your family and the church by excluding him.

If you decide he should be excluded, I think you will know you are right if you can explain to your sister and her husband why having him in your home for this type of occasion supports heresy, and how your action safeguards the gospel and Christian love. But if you don't have an explanation that connects those dots, and all you can say is "Well, there's this verse that says I have to keep you out because you're a heretic," you might be misusing the rule.

 

[Blood-Bought Pilgrim]

In context it seems to be dealing with false teachers in particular and not giving them a platform. If you think the gathering would be an occasion where he would be spreading his views, then I wouldn't invite him. If it would just be Thanksgiving Dinner with family, I'd invite him.

After all, if the verse is really dealing with anyone who doesn't teach the true gospel, you wouldn't be allowed to bring any unbelievers into your home at all.

 

[Alive in Christ]

That is not exactly what John was addressing. In those days, it was customary for missionaries/apostles to travel from city to city preaching in the local churches, and since they were full time in the ministry, they relied on the charity of Christians to support themselves. John is concerned with false apostles being given the support they need to continue spreading their lies, so he instructed the churches accordingly.

I believe you should extend Christian hospitality to the man and welcome him at your table with a gentle and gracious spirit. But by no means should you tolerate any blasphemous or corrupt talk under your roof. Depending on the man's temperament, it might be necessary to make that clear up front.

 

[Ploutos]

Invite him, but maybe have a conversation beforehand where some boundaries and parameters are set. If it seems like he won't be able to abide by those, he should not be there. Whether that means refusing to invite him at all, or being prepared to ask him to leave once he is there... That will be a matter for discernment.

 

[The Calvinistic Methodist]

Does 2John 1:10 Forbid allowing heretics into your home?
My brother in law has recently developed some very heretical views. He is supposed to be coming over on Thanksgiving with my sister and I am having second thoughts about having him over.

To be a little more specific, his most egregious offence is not just a denial of the Trinity, but calling it demonic.

I love my sister, but my personal conviction is that I should not invite him into my home.

I’ll be praying for a change in your family members heart. It’s hard to see family in a blasphemous state. I have two brothers, one who turned to satanism, and one who turned to Rome. I can’t imagine how much it hurts you to see your family member in this condition.

 

[Ben_Leevey]

After all, if the verse is really dealing with anyone who doesn't teach the true gospel, you wouldn't be allowed to bring any unbelievers into your home at all.

Well, John is speaking particularly of those who would claim to serve the Living God, and yet teach heresy...

 

[Blood-Bought Pilgrim]

Well, John is speaking particularly of those who would claim to serve the Living God, and yet teach heresy...

That’s my point— the context is clearly about not supporting/giving credence to false teachers. I don’t think it has anything to do with having family with heretical views over for dinner.

 

[Santos]

That’s my point— the context is clearly about not supporting/giving credence to false teachers. I don’t think it has anything to do with having family with heretical views over for dinner.

I'm sorry, I should have also provided a little more context. He stopped attending church earlier this year so he could focus on his Facebook ministry. He believes that he is a teacher/minister of the Word of God. He spends all of his time either watching YouTube or writing out various length messages on Facebook to "encourage and enlightened" people. He believes that God has given him special permission to forsake the gathering because his ministry is that important.

My main reason for quoting this verse in Johns Epistles is believing that it applies to him because he calls himself a teacher.

But you couldn't have known that because I didn't provide that information.

 

[Ploutos]

I'm sorry, I should have also provided a little more context. He stopped attending church earlier this year so he could focus on his Facebook ministry. He believes that he is a teacher/minister of the Word of God. He spends all of his time either watching YouTube or writing out various length messages on Facebook to "encourage and enlightened" people. He believes that God has given him special permission to forsake the gathering because his ministry is that important.

My main reason for quoting this verse in Johns Epistles is believing that it applies to him because he calls himself a teacher.

But you couldn't have known that because I didn't provide that information.

That doesn't really change the argument. This is not a matter of endorsing a false prophet. This is a family situation and I think boundaries should be drawn with that in mind.

You are not violating John's writing by inviting this man. But it may well be prudent not to. You should have a conversation and set some boundaries beforehand, and be prepared to uninvite him or even ask him to leave.

By the way, I have been in a like situation, so I have had opportunity to follow my own advice. Your proof text should be Ephesians 5-6, not 2 John, because this is a matter of how you lead your family and manage relationships in an honorable way.

 

[Ben_Leevey]

That’s my point— the context is clearly about not supporting/giving credence to false teachers. I don’t think it has anything to do with having family with heretical views over for dinner.

I would say it depends whether he tends to push his views or not.

 

[cthorn14]

Another consideration -- if the dinner is for Thanksgiving, whom will thanks be given to?

 

[Santos]

That doesn't really change the argument. This is not a matter of endorsing a false prophet. This is a family situation and I think boundaries should be drawn with that in mind.

You are not violating John's writing by inviting this man. But it may well be prudent not to. You should have a conversation and set some boundaries beforehand, and be prepared to uninvite him or even ask him to leave.

By the way, I have been in a like situation, so I have had opportunity to follow my own advice. Your proof text should be Ephesians 5-6, not 2 John, because this is a matter of how you lead your family and manage relationships in an honorable way.

I appreciate this answer very much. I had considered Ephesians 5-6 and my responsibilities as a husband and father.
I had also considered extending grace and having a preemptive conversation.
I have just been not sure whether the reference in 2John should also be taken into consideration.

Thank you.

Another consideration -- if the dinner is for Thanksgiving, whom will thanks be given to?

Indeed. I have considered this often.

 

[No Other Name]

Indeed. I have considered this often.

For give me and if this is too personal, but I was under the impression dinner is at your house?

So thanks is given to the thrice-holy God - Father, Son and Holy Spirt - transcendent, immanent, 3 persons, one essence forever glorified in all things. Like "my house, my view prevails", yes?

"As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord." And if you cannot agree with the prayer, politeness is your rule. (Like when my atheist brother visits). Or am I misunderstanding what you mean by it is something to be "considered"?

 

[Santos]

For give me and if this is too personal, but I was under the impression dinner is at your house?

So thanks is given to the thrice-holy God - Father, Son and Holy Spirt - transcendent, immanent, 3 persons, one essence forever glorified in all things. Like "my house, my view prevails", yes?

"As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord." And if you cannot agree with the prayer, politeness is your rule. (Like when my atheist brother visits). Or am I misunderstanding what you mean by it is something to be "considered"?

I think this may be a misunderstanding.

This dinner is at my house. And my family and I know to whom we give thanks.
I meant, why would he want to have dinner and agree with me in prayer, and thanksgiving when we are giving thanks to the Triune God of the Holy Scriptures.

 

[Alive in Christ]

I think this may be a misunderstanding.

This dinner is at my house. And my family and I know to whom we give thanks.
I meant, why would he want to have dinner and agree with me in prayer, and thanksgiving when we are giving thanks to the Triune God of the Holy Scriptures.

I suggest that you be the one to bless the food. And while this might seem unnecessarily petty and provocative to some, I believe that if I were you, I would go out of my way to do so in a very trinitarian manner. For instance, instead of the generic, "Lord God, we pray that...", I would begin the blessing with, "God our Father, we come to you in the name of your eternal Son, our Lord Jesus Christ...". No, I don't think that is goading him or being unreasonable at all. I think it's necessary that you make a real point to be accurate.

 

[The Calvinistic Methodist]

I suggest that you be the one to bless the food. And while this might seem unnecessarily petty and provocative to some, I believe that if I were you, I would go out of my way to do so in a very trinitarian manner. For instance, instead of the generic, "Lord God, we pray that...", I would begin the blessing with, "God our Father, we come to you in the name of your eternal Son, our Lord Jesus Christ...". No, I don't think that is goading him or being unreasonable at all. I think it's necessary that you make a real point to be accurate.

I think this is key. I’d invite him into the home, and show him love. But the blessing, should duly be trinitarian. It is our God Jehovah, who provides.
I’d only be worried about heresy in this setting if it was being spoken of or taught. In this case I would ask him to avoid proselytizing, or else be asked to leave