Good NIV acronyms

[larryjf]

Here's the deal.
I was a big influence in getting our Church to switch from NIV to ESV pew Bibles.
Now we finally got the new Bibles so we've started using the ESV in our teaching as well.
I help teach the Youth Group.
One of the youth and I have a jokingly debate about which is better as she still holds to her NIV. So we've started coming up with disparaging acronyms for the others version.

So far she is winning
I called the ESV "Extremely Superior Version", but i have a hard time with thinking of disparaging acronyms for the NIV.
I've used "non-inspired version"

But she had a really good one for the ESV - Evil Satanic Version.

Please help, i need to get an even better acronym for the NIV.

 

[NaphtaliPress]

I don't like the NIV but we need to treat the Word of God with care, even the poorer translations.
WLC Q101.What is required in the third commandment?
A. The third commandment requires, that the name of God, his titles, attributes, (k) ordinances, (l) the Word, (m) sacraments, (n) prayer, (o) oaths, (p) vows, (q) lots, (r) his works, (s) and whatsoever else there is whereby he makes himself known, be holily and reverently used in thought, (t) meditation, (u) word, (w) writing, (x) by an holy profession, (y) and answerable conversation, (z) to the glory of God, (a) and the good of ourselves (b) and others. (c)
k MAT 6:9; DEU 28:58; PSA 29:2; PSA 68:4; REV 15:3-4
l MAL 1:14; ECC 5:1
m PSA 138:2
n 1CO 11:24-25, 28-29
o 1TI 2:8
p JER 4:2
q ECC 5:2, 4-6
r ACT 1:24, 26
s JOB 36:24
t MAL 3:16
u PSA 8: throughout. RPc drops “throughout”.
w COL 3:17; PSA 105:2, 5
x PSA 102:18
y 1PE 3:15; MIC 4:5
z PHI 1:27
a 1CO 10:31 [vs 35 but text of 31: Maxey; RothB; THIRD; FOURTH; COX.]
b JER 32:39
c 1PE 2:12

 

[py3ak]

Nauseatingly Infantile Version
Niminy-piminy Insipid Version

 

[fivepointcalvinist]

how absurd to waste time over something so unimportant...

 

[beej6]

Non-Inspired Version is my favorite acronym.
But my default translation is the Essentially Similar Version.

Actually, the subject of translations probably deserves more discussion than it gets. Besides the obvious heretical versions...

Should we settle for a 'good enough' translation? I actually think the NIV is good enough, but not literal enough to be used as a study Bible. The Message, while providing interesting reading in parts and easy to read in large chunks, loses the holiness of the Word by being too vernacular. The argument that Koine Greek was the language of the people misses the fact that Greek is much better than English for communicating complex ideas.

And don't get me started that Bible translations have been left to parachurch organizations since... well, King James. Oh well.

 

[ServantOfKing]

I agree this is kind of silly... ;-)

I've heard the "Nearly Infallible Version"

The NIV really helped me growing up though because it was language I could easily understand & apply... lately I've gotten into the New American Standard Version

 

[LadyFlynt]

I called a pastor about the Geneva (one that is on WTS's board...but he had had no interest in the Geneva). He recommended the NIV or the ESV. I about gagged on the NIV suggestion, but held my tongue. Simply put...I won't touch an NIV with a 10ft pole. And yes, I have read it.

 

[KenPierce]

We suffer under the Nearly Inspired Perversion.

I think that is a good name: why? Because of the translation philosophy that undergirds it --pathetic, really. It is a perversion, and I am tired of having to take issue with "the Bible" in so many sermons!

And, Christopher, I hasten to add that I am scornfully critical of the NIV because I have such high regard for the Word of God.

 

[larryjf]

Chris,

I understand your point, but let me just point out something.

The Word that the WLC in Q101 points to is the Word of God, our Scriptures. How those Scriptures manifest themselves is in Q4 of the WLC...

Q. How doth it appear that the scriptures are the word of God?

A. The scriptures manifest themselves to be the word of god, by their majesty and purity; by the consent of all the parts, and scope of the whole, which is to give all glory to God; by their light and power to convince and convert sinners, to comfort and build up believers unto salvation: but the Spirit of God bearing witness by and with the scriptures in the heart of man, is alone able fully to persuade it that they are the very word of God.

I am not convinced that the NIV has the majesty or purity that is required of the Word of God.

 

[LadyFlynt]

Chris,

I understand your point, but let me just point out something.

The Word that the WLC in Q101 points to is the Word of God, our Scriptures. How those Scriptures manifest themselves is in Q4 of the WLC...

Q. How doth it appear that the scriptures are the word of God?

A. The scriptures manifest themselves to be the word of god, by their majesty and purity; by the consent of all the parts, and scope of the whole, which is to give all glory to God; by their light and power to convince and convert sinners, to comfort and build up believers unto salvation: but the Spirit of God bearing witness by and with the scriptures in the heart of man, is alone able fully to persuade it that they are the very word of God.

I am not convinced that the NIV has the majesty or purity that is required of the Word of God.

 

[Philip A]

how absurd to waste time over something so unimportant...

I agree entirely. Christians should never participate in humour or fun.

The Neophyte's Introductory Version told me so....

I think the Not A Scholarly Bible says the same thing.

But since I started reading the Extremely Superior Version, I've come to appreciate beautiful things in life, like literature, poetry, and humour. And British spellings.

But all that will change when I get my Geneva Bible and become the head of an über-fundy GBOnly cult. Then we will really tear up on those Nefariously Ignorant Version readers.

 

[LadyFlynt]

But all that will change when I get my Geneva Bible and become the head of an über-fundy GBOnly cult. Then we will really tear up on those Nefariously Ignorant Version readers.