Divorce - why is the non guilty person punished?

[Richard King]

I didn't know whether to post this in Family issues or Church issues but I am pondering something. I have been in a Baptist church where a divorced man was not allowed to be a deacon and in a megasuperjumbo charismatic church where divorced men were not allowed to become deacons.
Though the pastor's own tale of "falling away from the faith during college" made a divorce pale in comparisson to what he did.

And this morning I marveled at the knowledge and skill of the man teaching the our adult Bible study or Sunday school and I learned later that he was once a pastor somewhere but could no longer be ...due to his divorce...which happened sometime after his wife ran off on him.
What gives with this thinking?

 

[bfrank]

I would maintain that in the case of the former pastor/sunday school teacher that though this man's wife left him, there was a reason for her doing so. Since I don't know the intricacies of the relationship I can't speak to them. However, there was undoubtedly a "reason" for her leaving. What was his sin that he was not able to keep his house in order? Perhaps he was absolutely blameless in this matter, though its hard to believe, but it does happen...perhaps then he should continue on in a pastoral role? I would argue that he should not, at least not for some time or unless very unusual circumstances arose. Why?

Though this man may be qualified for pastor/elder does not mean he fulfills God's standard of pastor/elder. A pastor/elder should be above reproach in these matters that fault would not be found in him. He should be blameless. Though he may be able to lend some great insight into these circumstances I would argue that he is no longer blameless. If there are men qualified, that fit the standard God has set for men in leadership...those men should step into those roles.

What if the divorce happened before he was redeemed? Does that then nullify this reasoning? Wouldn't that be an excellent picture of the Grace of God? Perhaps. I would still maintain that though he may be qualified, he no longer fits the standard. He may then have to spend much time and energy defending his position on his divorce or divorce and remarriage instead of dealing with matters of the Church. This may be a huge distraction to the work of the local body.

I would argue that perhaps through no fault of his own he is divorced, pastoral ministry must certainly be put on the back burner unless unusual circumstances arise.

These other churches you spoke of probably have these "guidelines" in place to deal with this type of a situation.

Perhaps this pastor's tale of "falling away" during college spoke to his youth and disobedience. Maybe it was because of an unbelieving, unredeemed heart. He may have truly came to faith after college.