Any other contenders for the Kitchen Klutz Award?

Discussion in 'Entertainment and Humor' started by Laura, Aug 21, 2009.

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  1. Laura

    Laura Puritan Board Junior

    You're up against uncommon competition, if I say so myself.

    Within about a week, I:
    - scattered the contents of a large cutting board (green bean ends/scraps) all over the floor;
    - managed to procure a third-degree burn on my upper arm from contact with a just-turned-off glass stovetop burner (who forgets that a burner was on within two minutes of shutting it off oneself?);
    - nearly burned the house down by spilling coffee grounds all over the very same burner while it was being used (on high) to boil water (though now our house smells like slightly over-roasted coffee beans---worse things could happen);
    - scared the cat out of the room by opening a cupboard and causing a small avalanche of plastic measuring cups and coffee brewing instruments...

    On the upside, amidst all this chaos I set my personal best record for drop biscuits. Yum.
  2. Ruby

    Ruby Puritan Board Junior

    A profitable week indeed, Laura!!
  3. Theognome

    Theognome Burrito Bill

    Klutz move #1- Positive boon. Us carnivores have no respect for green beans.
    Klutz move #2- Positive boon. It is irrefutable proof that you slaved over a hot stove. Score sympathy points and a future dinner on the town.
    Klutz move #3- Positive boon. You already said it... Can you say, 'cheap whole-house potpourri'?
    Klutz move #4- Positive boon. Funny as all get out, so you get positive points. Bonus points if you got it on video and can post it on YouTube.

    So all that's left is the drop biscuits, which you admit are your personal best. So now you know the full process of performing at your peak potential. Klutz on, sister!

  4. AThornquist

    AThornquist Puritan Board Doctor

    At least you didn't mis-cram soap anywhere?

  5. Hungus

    Hungus Puritan Board Freshman

    Or serve steamed veggies with mexican food.

    Yeah I will get over it but I need the humour today.
  6. AThornquist

    AThornquist Puritan Board Doctor

    :lol: If you need to beat me up because you're stressed or whatever, feel free. However, it'll set you back about $10 every 5 minutes.
  7. Repre5entYHWH

    Repre5entYHWH Puritan Board Freshman

    sometimes my wife will drop the whole meal on the floor, shes gotten to the point were we will still eat it depending on when she mopped last. i think your in good company
  8. Laura

    Laura Puritan Board Junior

    Very insightful indeed! Though I resent the green bean-dissing. I'll have you know that there was plenty of bacon in the final product!

    Unfortunately I do not have a webcam in my kitchen to capture golden moments such as the cat's terrified exodus.

    I can't believe I'm incurring risk to myself by quoting and countenancing your own boldness, but LOL.

    What, are steamed veggies only to be served with Asian food or something?

    Oh wow. I think I would cry. No matter when I last mopped, we have a cat ... we don't wash her paws ...
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