Created to be His Helpmeet by Debi Pearl

SemperWife · #1 (**permalink**) 08-15-2007, 03:06 AM

I have not yet read the book, but have been told by a number of ladies that "this is a good book." I know there are some controversial things about the Pearls. I have also been a big fan of "An Excellent Wife." Have any of you read the book? How would you compare it to "An Excellent Wife" if you have read them both? What are the good and bad things about "Created to be His Helpmeet?" I would love to get some nice reformed opinions before I read it.

LadyFlynt · #2 (**permalink**) 08-15-2007, 07:05 AM

It would be one to definately AVOID. If the site of the "other women" was CMOMB, then please PM me.

The Pearls theology is so out in left field it is not even funny.

There was an excellent review of CTBHH done here
...please read all the sections. Your hubby might be interested in reading the review as well.

py3ak · #3 (**permalink**) 08-15-2007, 01:22 PM

My mom liked it so well she was giving it out to everyone. I skimmed it. I suppose it probably has some decent practical advice; but the Pearls are thorough-going Pelagians, and believe that the "distinction" between the kingdom of God and the kingdom of Heaven is the key to understanding the Bible.

Of course, I also made my wife stop reading Martha Peace stuff, so my advice may not count for much. It seems to me that there is a creeping legalism in a lot of stuff that is written to be "practical", and even from a Reformed perspective, often seems not to be based on a real understanding of grace (and here let me formally reprobate antinomianism and spit upon the doctrine as heartily as I may).

LadyFlynt · #4 (**permalink**) 08-15-2007, 01:54 PM

The Pearls do not believe in being born with a sin nature and they believe that a person can truely live a sinless life. That is only the beginning of the problem.

Ruben if you didn't like Martha Peace...a thorough reading of CTBHH will send you steaming off.

Laura · #5 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 06:40 AM

Sonya, I am familiar with both of the books you mention, but for fear of what is in any contemporary, widely praised book for women, I've passed them over. Thanks LadyFlynt for the warning about the Pearls.

IMHO, the Puritans, while necessarily failing at the cultural relevance that books published now could have, are much better at instructing wives as to their duties!

(I have an edited version of that last link, Whately's, which is much easier on the eyes, if anyone would like it.)

J. R. Miller, a Presbyterian pastor in the 19th century, wrote a few slightly Victorian but honestly charming and, so far as I can tell, truthful treatises on sustaining/improving marriage and home life. If nothing else they stir up more informed desires to be married already, or in your case I suppose to improve the way you relate to your family.

But the best truly contemporary book I've read was Carolyn Mahaney's Feminine Appeal. Some parts I only skimmed, but I have read most of it at least once, and it is very sound in my judgment. She deals with timeless principles as well as a few hot topics like working outside the home, in a very balanced but not relativistic way. It is like reading a series of personal letters from an older sister or mother, and lacking that guidance such a book from such a woman is all the more precious.

Just some suggestions, take them for what they're worth. I don't want to derail this from the topic you had wanted to discuss, but I'm always itching to throw out those links in case anybody hasn't experienced Puritan wisdom on the subject yet.

SemperWife · #6 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

It would be one to definately AVOID. If the site of the "other women" was CMOMB, then please PM me.

The Pearls theology is so out in left field it is not even funny.

There was an excellent review of CTBHH done here
...please read all the sections. Your hubby might be interested in reading the review as well.

Thanks for the link. I checked it out. I don't think I will be reading this one.

I was curious because there is a woman at our church that pretty much believes most of what she reads and she is into the Pearls right now. She is in a marriage where her husband won't lead and neglects family responsibilities. So she looks to books for answers and unfortunately is looking in the wrong places. I will pass the link along to her. Perhaps she can at least take a second look at what she is choosing to believe.

SemperWife · #7 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Ruben if you didn't like Martha Peace...a thorough reading of CTBHH will send you steaming off.

By Reuben:

Quote:

Of course, I also made my wife stop reading Martha Peace stuff, so my advice may not count for much. It seems to me that there is a creeping legalism in a lot of stuff that is written to be "practical", and even from a Reformed perspective, often seems not to be based on a real understanding of grace (and here let me formally reprobate antinomianism and spit upon the doctrine as heartily as I may).

Just a note. I overstated my like for Martha Peace. I shouldn't have said "I am a fan" as that is the only book of hers that I have read. I should have said that I liked the book. I reviewed much of the book with my husband and we found flaws, but were able to appreciate the overall sentiment. I was careful to note many of the flaws and it made for many good discussions on the issue of submission with my husband.

LadyFlint, I am still looking through the reviews on the link you sent. So far, good stuff......

calgal · #8 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SemperWife

Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

It would be one to definately AVOID. If the site of the "other women" was CMOMB, then please PM me.

The Pearls theology is so out in left field it is not even funny.

There was an excellent review of CTBHH done here
...please read all the sections. Your hubby might be interested in reading the review as well.

Thanks for the link. I checked it out. I don't think I will be reading this one.

I was curious because there is a woman at our church that pretty much believes most of what she reads and she is into the Pearls right now. She is in a marriage where her husband won't lead and neglects family responsibilities. So she looks to books for answers and unfortunately is looking in the wrong places. I will pass the link along to her. Perhaps she can at least take a second look at what she is choosing to believe.

Interesting link and I will skip that book also. I like reading some non Reformed Christian books but learned to sift carefully and discerningly. Does anyone have an opinion on Nancy Leigh DeMoss? I like her but find her a bit too legalistic at times.

py3ak · #9 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 10:36 AM

Well, now I am embarrassed as the only non-female to post on this thread. Laura, pelt them with some more links while I run and hide.

LadyFlynt · #10 (**permalink**) 08-16-2007, 11:03 AM

@ Ruben!

I really enjoy Nancy Leigh DeMoss...she is one that I would recommend and personally enjoy. Ten Lies Women Believe is excellent. I led an online study of that one at one time.

Megaloo · #11 (**permalink**) 08-17-2007, 11:59 AM

Thank you for the links on the Pearl book LadyFlynt. I will be going through this book with some ladies who really enjoy this help meet book. The more I hear about the Pearls though, the less interested I am. I think it will be good to go through this book because maybe I can put some more Scripture in the study and get them to think about that instead. We are having a bible study online. My friend loves the Pearls. She won't be living around here much longer and this is about the best I can get with her. Tough situation. Any thoughts are welcome. I want to do the right thing.
GOD bless you guys.