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Old 04-22-2008, 05:44 PM
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Money During Seminary

I am going to be finishing my B.S. of Biblical Studies here at the beginning of July. July 18 I am going to be getting married. In August, I am starting seminary to prepare for the ministry.

Currently, I work part time (running my own online bookstore) as I am taking 18+ credit hours at school. My fiancee is going to have a steady teaching job starting this fall.

My question is:
Would it be wrong for me to continue to work part time and her full time while I go to seminary full time? She would thus be making more of the monthly income, but this way I could concentrate fully on seminary and get through quicker...
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Old 04-22-2008, 05:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bconway52 View Post
Would it be wrong for me to continue to work part time and her full time while I go to seminary full time?
There is probably a great deal of opinions on this matter, but I would say that this would be wrong. If you are marrying her, you should have the intention of being able to provide for her. Planning on spending the next several years dependant on her for your bread and butter would not be a wise move. Have you considered attending seminary part-time? What happens if she gets pregnant and is unable to provide for you; would you be willing to step aside from seminary at that point?
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Old 04-22-2008, 06:01 PM
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Hey, you may wanna see this thread Woman as Primary Bread Winner?
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Old 04-22-2008, 06:12 PM
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There is absolutely nothing wrong with this. You are making an investment with your time in seminary. Worrying about your wife making more money than you during this time (or any other time, if you ask me) is putting an undue burden on your conscience.

Remember, you are not the head of your house because you make more money than your wife, but because God has so ordained it thus. There is nothing "unmanly" about your wife making more than you do (and for the record: I work, my wife doesn't). Further, if your wife knows that this will be the situation for the first couple of years of your marriage, and she is ok with it, then what other approval do you need? (well, maybe her father's, but assuming he is fine with the situation, you are in the clear).

I mean, if you were to suddenly lose your job/online bookstore, would you require your wife to quit her job so that she isn't making more than you?

BTW - What is the link to your online bookstore? I'll have to check it out.
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Old 04-22-2008, 06:42 PM
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I as well work part-time while my Wife works Full-Time while I am in Seminary. It would place an undue financial burden on me and my family to do otherwise.
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:06 PM
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A principle in (continental) reformed church government is, that the churches in common have to see to the support of the students studying for the ministry:

As per the Church Order of Dordt:

Quote:
Article 19
The Churches shall exert themselves, as far as necessary, that there may be students supported by them to be trained for the Ministry of the Word.
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:25 PM
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Mr. Mulder,

I have thought about this. Does your church/denomination implement this? Our denomination I believe would like to, but since we are smaller I don't believe it is possible at this point in time.
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:28 PM
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Why not marry her after your seminary education, when you are ready to provide for her?

Marriage is not only a privilege but also a responsibility. If you will not be ready to take on the responsibility of a family until after your education, then why not wait?

What if you have children during your schooling? Would your wife keep working or stay home with the children?
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Old 04-22-2008, 07:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bconway52 View Post
Mr. Mulder,

I have thought about this. Does your church/denomination implement this? Our denomination I believe would like to, but since we are smaller I don't believe it is possible at this point in time.
Yes we do

We have regular collections in our churches for the 'Seminary student aid fund'.

As well, there is an amount assessed by the synodical treaserer for the operations of the seminary, as well as for student aid.

And in addition, we have a scholarship fund, for which aspiring ministers and teachers can apply.
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Old 04-22-2008, 08:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BertMulder View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by bconway52 View Post
Mr. Mulder,

I have thought about this. Does your church/denomination implement this? Our denomination I believe would like to, but since we are smaller I don't believe it is possible at this point in time.
Yes we do

We have regular collections in our churches for the 'Seminary student aid fund'.

As well, there is an amount assessed by the synodical treaserer for the operations of the seminary, as well as for student aid.

And in addition, we have a scholarship fund, for which aspiring ministers and teachers can apply.
I am going to see to it that my church "adopts" a seminary student once I get a church. It is pathetic how many churches do not support their students.
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Old 04-22-2008, 08:29 PM
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If it's any news to anyone, I'm in law school. Didn't think that was news, so now that that's out of the way, I'm getting married in December.

I will be taking an Evidence class early this summer, hopefully volunteering at a local law firm, and working when I can. When school starts back, I will again be attending school full time and working when I can. My fiancee' is looking for a full-time job. When we marry in December, she will be making the most money between the two of us until I get out of law school. When I'm out, she never has to work again. I see nothing wrong with the proposition other than it's going to be a little tougher than it will be for most, but then, most people don't pursue post-graduate degrees. The amount of money you make doesn't make you "more" of a household head. Are men who make $22,000/yr. lesser household heads than others?

Better yet, are we, as Christians, restricted to marrying within our own class? That's what some people seem to be suggesting. If one godly man is an auto-mechanic and makes $25,000/yr. and he wants to marry a godly woman who is a pharmacist who makes $50,000/yr., some here appear to think that they should not be allowed to marry because the woman would make more and the man couldn't be the household head? Honestly, is Classism what Christians are suggesting we revert to?

As per the "wait" suggestion. I have waited. I have endured things you wouldn't stand to be done to you and I have come out better for it. I have waited for over 3 years for my wife and I will have waited nearly 4 by the time we are married. She has been terrified I would leave and I havn't budged. I will go into no further detail but we will wait no longer.
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Old 04-22-2008, 08:39 PM
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I think we should see this difficult decision as the result of a broken system. I do not mean to derail the thread here, and I know this has been discussed before but here are a few reasons why men are placed in this position.

1. The price of seminary education is outrageous.

2. The church has too often passed along the responsibility of educating its men to independent bodies.

3. Men are too often required to uproot their families and leave productive jobs in order to attend a far away seminary. Alternatives should be more readily available.

4. Churches are busy spending money on other things, instead of educating men for the ministry.

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Old 04-22-2008, 08:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by markkoller View Post
I think we should see this difficult decision as the result of a broken system. I do not mean to derail the thread here, and I know this has been discussed before but here are a few reasons why men are placed in this position.

1. The price of seminary education is outrageous.

2. The church has too often passed along the responsibility of educating its men to independent bodies.

3. Men are too often required to uproot their families and leave productive jobs in order to attend a far away seminary. Alternatives should be more readily available.

4. Churches are busy spending money on other things, instead of educating men for the ministry.

Those are some of the concerns that lead to the creation of The North American Reformed Seminary...
The North American Reformed Seminary
A completely free Reformed seminary that seeks to work along side of the local church instead of displace it.
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Old 04-22-2008, 08:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zenas View Post
The amount of money you make doesn't make you "more" of a household head. Are men who make $22,000/yr. lesser household heads than others?

Better yet, are we, as Christians, restricted to marrying within our own class? That's what some people seem to be suggesting.
I am not sure who would suggest either of these ideas. I would reiterate that it is a bad idea to get married, with the intention of your wife supporting you through seminary, or an extended amount of time. It might be acceptable in certain circumstances, but this was a particular case, where opinions were sought. Since you brought your personal situation into play, I would comment that it is a great deal different than the one being discussed. In your case (correct me if I am wrong), you are already well into law school, while the opening post refers to an individual who has yet to begin seminary, and is looking at three plus years of schooling, and then a search/wait for a call.
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Old 04-22-2008, 08:58 PM
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I study at seminary full-time and work part-time and my wife works part-times as well. The Lord has provided us with all our needs. I also have two children aged 5 and 3 and I have no worries that my family and I will continue to rest in the palm of the Lord. Answer the Lord's call in you life. Our Saviour and the disciples were financially supported by women.

and Joanna, the wife of Chuza, Herod’s household manager, and Susanna, and many others, who provided for them [Jesus and the disciples]out of their means. Luke 8:3 (ESV)
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Old 04-22-2008, 10:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zenas View Post
As per the "wait" suggestion. I have waited. I have endured things you wouldn't stand to be done to you and I have come out better for it. I have waited for over 3 years for my wife and I will have waited nearly 4 by the time we are married. She has been terrified I would leave and I havn't budged. I will go into no further detail but we will wait no longer.
This is interesting to me. Did you live near your fiancé for those three or four years?
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Old 04-22-2008, 10:20 PM
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Define near. 30 minute drive away.

If you're wondering if we could see each other constantly, the answer is no.
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Old 04-23-2008, 11:49 AM
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I am curious as to how seminary students have kids, go to school, and make enough money to live?

I am a seminary student, and my wife was a student when I moved on campus last semester. She is now working full-time, and I am working about 20-25 hrs a week. If we had a child at this time, I would probably have to be part-time in school, because I do not see how we could live. We do not even have kids right now, and I am trying to figure out how to pay for summer and fall classes...
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Old 04-23-2008, 11:54 AM
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My fiancee's father pulled it off. He and his wife were both in seminary full-time, they both worked part-time, and they both had their first son while they were there. It can be done. I don't know how.
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Old 04-23-2008, 11:56 AM
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I am aware that it CAN be done. I would just like someone to explain HOW it can be done...
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Old 04-23-2008, 12:01 PM
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Sell drugs?
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Old 04-23-2008, 12:53 PM
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I am aware that it CAN be done. I would just like someone to explain HOW it can be done...
Read my post above. I have two children, a mortgage and a car payment. I did receive a scholarship for seminary, but my wife and I both work part-time. All I can say or explain is this; if you are called the Lord will provide, as nothing is impossible with the Lord.

You can pm me if you like.
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Old 04-23-2008, 01:24 PM
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I must mention as an aside, that when I saw the title "money during semianry" I assumed this thread belonged under the entertainment forum
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Old 04-23-2008, 01:35 PM
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Zenas;

Quote:
My fiancee's father pulled it off. He and his wife were both in seminary full-time, they both worked part-time, and they both had their first son while they were there. It can be done. I don't know how.
Sounds like a great conversation for you and your soon to be FIL to have..
Find out how they made it, what advice he would share, things he would do differently, and soforth..
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Old 04-23-2008, 03:49 PM
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My fiancee's father pulled it off. He and his wife were both in seminary full-time, they both worked part-time, and they both had their first son while they were there. It can be done. I don't know how.
Probably due to a lower cost of living at the time of their education. Pretty hard to do in the current age, of increasing costs for education and anything else.
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