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04-05-2008, 08:48 PM
|  | Puritanboard Graduate | | Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Rockville, CT
Posts: 3,646
Thanks: 609
Thanked 925 Times in 709 Posts
| | | Nine--one--one or nine--eleven? BELIEVE it or not, these are REAL 911 Calls!
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back >rom the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, bu t I'm not stupid.
My Personal Favorite!!!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!
And the winner is..........
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, wher e are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No .
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police. | | The Following User Says Thank You to Presbyterian Deacon For This Useful Post: | | 
04-05-2008, 08:52 PM
|  | Puritanboard Graduate | | Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Pickens, SC
Posts: 3,306
Thanks: 922
Thanked 1,262 Times in 676 Posts
| | Quote:
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, wher e are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No .
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police.
|
__________________ J Baldwin
Keowee Presbyterian Church, PCA
Pickens, SC “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” Luke 10:27 Check Out My Blog: http://reflectjoy.blogspot.com/ | 
04-05-2008, 09:10 PM
|  | The Closer | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Wytheville, Virginia
Posts: 5,505
Thanks: 1,659
Thanked 1,075 Times in 698 Posts
| | | | 
04-05-2008, 09:34 PM
|  | Meum cerebrum nocet | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: San Gabriel, CA
Posts: 7,505
Thanks: 1,767
Thanked 3,535 Times in 1,715 Posts
| |
__________________
Dennis E. McFadden, Ex Mainline Baptist (in Remission)
Atherton Baptist Homes, CEO
First Baptist Church of Alhambra, Member, Transformation Ministries (CA)
Click to get: Board Rules -- Signature Requirements -- Suggestions? | 
04-05-2008, 09:54 PM
| | Puritanboard Junior | | Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 1,926
Thanks: 652
Thanked 684 Times in 287 Posts
| | |
I confess I thought this thread was going to be about Rudy Giuliani.
__________________
Jeremy Gage
First Baptist Church
Durham, NC
"No heart can conceive that treasury of mercies which lies in this one privilege, in having liberty and ability to approach unto God at all times, according to his mind and will." - John Owen
| 
04-05-2008, 11:04 PM
|  | Iron Dramatist | | Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Decorah, IA
Posts: 6,251
Thanks: 247
Thanked 2,369 Times in 1,238 Posts
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by smhbbag I confess I thought this thread was going to be about Rudy Giuliani. | It was.. just look! Quote:
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from
the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
| | 
04-05-2008, 11:07 PM
|  | Puritanboard Graduate | | Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Rockville, CT
Posts: 3,646
Thanks: 609
Thanked 925 Times in 709 Posts
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by toddpedlar Quote:
Originally Posted by smhbbag I confess I thought this thread was going to be about Rudy Giuliani. | It was.. just look! Quote:
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from
the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
| | | 
04-05-2008, 11:08 PM
|  | The Closer | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Wytheville, Virginia
Posts: 5,505
Thanks: 1,659
Thanked 1,075 Times in 698 Posts
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by toddpedlar Quote:
Originally Posted by smhbbag I confess I thought this thread was going to be about Rudy Giuliani. | It was.. just look! Quote:
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from
the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
| | | 
04-05-2008, 11:25 PM
|  | Puritanboard Junior | | Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Ellicott City, MD
Posts: 1,979
Thanks: 546
Thanked 248 Times in 98 Posts
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Presbyterian Deacon
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, bu t I'm not stupid. | Dispatcher: Oh yes you are, caller!
| 
04-05-2008, 11:34 PM
|  | Megerator | | Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Portland,OR
Posts: 10,723
Thanks: 1,738
Thanked 953 Times in 794 Posts
| | |
Just when I was feeling REALLY dumb...
| 
04-06-2008, 12:26 AM
|  | Puritanboard Graduate | | Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Lakewood, CA
Posts: 3,237
Thanks: 5
Thanked 579 Times in 328 Posts
| |
One of these days, one of those callers just might make it onto the Darwin Awards List... | 
04-06-2008, 08:54 AM
|  | Puritanboard Graduate | | Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Winchester, VA
Posts: 3,170
Thanks: 745
Thanked 1,047 Times in 627 Posts
| | Quote:
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, bu t I'm not stupid.
| This one actually happened way back in '82 or so in Goleta, CA. I was living in San Luis Obispo at the time, and it ran in the SLO paper. Goleta has held a special place in my heart ever since.
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