Ways to make your wife feel loved and appreciated?

**Brother John** · 03-06-2009, 11:03 AM

I am looking for suggestions on special things I can do for my wife to make her feel appreciated and loved. When we first married I always went out of my way to do little things that my wife appreciated. I will admit that I have slipped in my duties. Six years, two boys, work, etc... Men please let me know what yall have done and ladies let me know what your husbands have done for you. I would really like to here from the ladies. What can we husbands do for our wives that will show our love and appreciation?

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 11:05 AM

One I had to find out the hard way -- turn off the TV while she is talking to you! This is especially effective if sports are on!

**Brother John** · 03-06-2009, 11:11 AM

Originally Posted by Marrow Man

One I had to find out the hard way -- turn off the TV while she is talking to you! This is especially effective if sports are on!

That is true

We don't have cable or satilite. But I have gotten some flack from reading and the PB.

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 11:19 AM

Ruben is kind and patient every day.

For instance one evening recently I didn't do a very good job making dinner (readjusting to an electric stove from a gas skillet) and asked him about his meal (I knew it was an abomination). He smiled happily and said, "Well the chicken is burned, the peas are crunchy, and the potatoes are smushy. But here I sit, eating it all, because I love you."

Maybe you can't always say something so perfectly charming, but that sort of happy gentleness and patience daily mean more than any special occasion thing to me.

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 11:25 AM

I was a bachelor for 33 years, so I learned to cook and clean and all that long before I met her. But have you tried cooking a meal for her sometime? Also, set the table and clean up afterward. That would let her know you think she is special.

And here's a suggestion (not one that I've followed personally though!); perhaps taking the time to write her a long love letter (and I mean hand write, not type) would be good. Godly men of old did that to their loves.

Back when I was wooing her, I memorized poems and recited those to her. In particular, I memorized Bobby Burns' "O My Love Is Like a Red, Red Rose" (she's Scottish, remember!). Perhaps you can do that!

**Knoxienne** · 03-06-2009, 11:25 AM

Cleaning up the kitchen after dinner if she's too tired or not feeling well.

Fixing things(or arranging them to get fixed) around the house

Dates - even going out to for a hamburger or ice cream for an hour or so is nice.

Buying little items she likes at the store without her asking (favorite cocoas, coffee, coffee creamers, fruit, cheese, snacks, candy bars, a book or video she's been wanting, etc)

When we have guests, Bill will often make the main dish so that all I have to do is pick up the house a bit and throw a quick dessert together.

Sometimes I'll be emptying the dishwasher and Bill will help me while we have a little conversation about our day.

If a child or other family member is calling, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM or whatever" and you're home and it's something you can take care of, tell them Mom is busy and take care of the problem.

Tell your wife to invite some lady friends over for coffee and snacks and serve them the coffee and the snacks while they visit.

Carry in the groceries or other storebought goods for her and help her put them away.

Don't just tell her she's the most beautiful woman in the world, but the only woman in the world.

**Jimmy the Greek** · 03-06-2009, 11:34 AM

I am worried that you have to ask...

You know her better than we do. You said you "used to do little things". Do them again.

All I can say after 43 years with my sweetheart, is it's not what you buy her that makes a difference.

**Kim G** · 03-06-2009, 11:34 AM

Originally Posted by Knoxienne

Cleaning up the kitchen after dinner if she's too tired or not feeling well.

My dear husband has been doing this all too often recently since I've been sick with our first pregnancy. He cooks dinner and cleans it up himself. It's such a blessing.

Dates - even going out to for a hamburger or ice cream for an hour or so is nice.

May I recommend McDonalds? Yes, I know.

But I hadn't been to one in years, and the ones near us all look like a nice coffee house inside. We were the only ones in the restaurant and enjoyed dessert off the dollar menu.

Don't just tell her she's the most beautiful woman in the world, but the only woman in the world.

My husband always says I'm the most beautiful women in the universe, just in case there are any astronauts or aliens who aren't in the world at the moment.

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 11:47 AM

Maybe I'm an alien! --if R told me I was the most beautiful woman on earth I would wonder what was wrong with his eyes :-). I know he prefers me, even way I look, to any woman on earth, and that matters far more to me. I think women probably do vary in this and other specifics: as Gomarus says, you know your own wife best.

**Scottish Lass** · 03-06-2009, 11:47 AM

Any extra chore around the house is always appreciated. Tim brings me a treat if he's near a coffee house or sweet shop I like. Remind her how beautiful you think she is--actually tell her out loud (or on paper) that she's a good wife, mother, etc. This goes for both sides--often we think/assume the other person knows we feel that way, but we need to say it.

**lynnie** · 03-06-2009, 12:19 PM

Ask her what will bless her most. It will probably the the last thing in the world you want to do or initiate.

Dan Allender has a funny story about this. He mustered up the grace to ask his wife what change she most wanted to see, and mentally prepared himself for a whole list of things he thought she might say, and was prepared to do them all. So she says that what bothers her the most and what she really wants to see changed is for him to witness to their (regular contact) neighbors. It was the absolute last thing in the world he wanted to do, and here she was with this heavy burden for them, all alone.

We've had some big conflict over the years where hub looked at all he does (and it is a lot, and very sacrificial) and felt like I was ungrateful, but I felt like the one thing I wanted most was more praying together, and him taking the lead in it at home, especially prayer for the kids (at the time he was just great at church, but alone with me he'd slack off). Its almost 30 years now and I am happy with things now, but it wasn't always so.

So ask your wife what matters the most. And do it!

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 12:23 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Maybe I'm an alien! --if R told me I was the most beautiful woman on earth I would wonder what was wrong with his eyes :-). I know he prefers me, even way I look, to any woman on earth, and that matters far more to me. I think women probably do vary in this and other specifics: as Gomarus says, you know your own wife best.

But Heidi, you get to be married to The Batman!

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 12:25 PM

Originally Posted by Marrow Man

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Maybe I'm an alien! --if R told me I was the most beautiful woman on earth I would wonder what was wrong with his eyes :-). I know he prefers me, even way I look, to any woman on earth, and that matters far more to me. I think women probably do vary in this and other specifics: as Gomarus says, you know your own wife best.

But Heidi, you get to be married to The Batman!

And I get to ride in the Batmobile. In case you were wondering, we've had it painted gold to blend with traffic and it has a sunroof and remote keyless entry.

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 12:28 PM

There is a little book that has pictures of a husband vacuuming the floor, doing dishes, buying flowers, cooking supper, changing the baby's diaper, etc....and this is so true. What chore is the one your wife feels the most buried under and that is where my husband would start for me.

Bring her a treat. Something little, something she loves.

And simply telling her regularly how much you both love and APPRECIATE her and everything she does. How you got the best when you got her

w · 03-06-2009, 12:29 PM

Listen

**Theognome** · 03-06-2009, 12:30 PM

Originally Posted by Knoxienne

Cleaning up the kitchen after dinner if she's too tired or not feeling well.

Fixing things(or arranging them to get fixed) around the house

Dates - even going out to for a hamburger or ice cream for an hour or so is nice.

Buying little items she likes at the store without her asking (favorite cocoas, coffee, coffee creamers, fruit, cheese, snacks, candy bars, a book or video she's been wanting, etc)

When we have guests, Bill will often make the main dish so that all I have to do is pick up the house a bit and throw a quick dessert together.

Sometimes I'll be emptying the dishwasher and Bill will help me while we have a little conversation about our day.

If a child or other family member is calling, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM or whatever" and you're home and it's something you can take care of, tell them Mom is busy and take care of the problem.

Tell your wife to invite some lady friends over for coffee and snacks and serve them the coffee and the snacks while they visit.

Carry in the groceries or other storebought goods for her and help her put them away.

Don't just tell her she's the most beautiful woman in the world, but the only woman in the world.

Good ideas. I should try them sometime...

Yer the Purdiest of all the girls in the multiverse! (of course, there is only one girl, too.)

Theognome

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 12:31 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Originally Posted by Marrow Man

But Heidi, you get to be married to The Batman!

And I get to ride in the Batmobile. In case you were wondering, we've had it painted gold to blend with traffic and it has a sunroof and remote keyless entry.

But the most important question of all Heidi, is this: "Does he have Bruce Wayne's money?"

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 12:32 PM

*waits around to see how long it takes Reuben to buy Heidi a chinchilla*

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 12:32 PM

hmmm . . . that is the corker.

**Knoxienne** · 03-06-2009, 12:32 PM

Originally Posted by Theognome

Originally Posted by Knoxienne

Cleaning up the kitchen after dinner if she's too tired or not feeling well.

Fixing things(or arranging them to get fixed) around the house

Dates - even going out to for a hamburger or ice cream for an hour or so is nice.

Buying little items she likes at the store without her asking (favorite cocoas, coffee, coffee creamers, fruit, cheese, snacks, candy bars, a book or video she's been wanting, etc)

When we have guests, Bill will often make the main dish so that all I have to do is pick up the house a bit and throw a quick dessert together.

Sometimes I'll be emptying the dishwasher and Bill will help me while we have a little conversation about our day.

If a child or other family member is calling, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM or whatever" and you're home and it's something you can take care of, tell them Mom is busy and take care of the problem.

Tell your wife to invite some lady friends over for coffee and snacks and serve them the coffee and the snacks while they visit.

Carry in the groceries or other storebought goods for her and help her put them away.

Don't just tell her she's the most beautiful woman in the world, but the only woman in the world.

Good ideas. I should try them sometime...

Yer the Purdiest of all the girls in the multiverse! (of course, there is only one girl, too.)

Theognome

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 12:40 PM

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Bring her a treat. Something little, something she loves.

Just wanted to highlight this again. Something little. Something she loves.

Chinchillas

**Theognome** · 03-06-2009, 12:42 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Bring her a treat. Something little, something she loves.

Just wanted to highlight this again. Something little. Something she loves.

Chinchillas

Good highlight- ya gotta know what she loves, of course. Hmmm... where can I find a box set of some sappy '80's sitcom DVD real quick...

Theognome

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 12:44 PM

Give her the gift of Hulu.

**tdowns** · 03-06-2009, 12:45 PM

I always recommend, "A squeeze play a day."

With kids, and life, days can be crazy, so, I tell people and myself, to at least once a day, go in for the squeeze play; a long hug, with eye contact, an "I love you" and kiss.

Seems simple, but, I think many miss it and days go by without it.

**Theognome** · 03-06-2009, 12:49 PM

Originally Posted by tdowns

I always recommend, "A squeeze play a day."

With kids, and life, days can be crazy, so, I tell people and myself, to at least once a day, go in for the squeeze play; a long hug, with eye contact, an "I love you" and kiss.

Seems simple, but, I think many miss it and days go by without it.

Good call. Every day, when I get home from work, the first thing I do is give her a very long hug, which is finished when I sigh the word, 'HOME!'.

Theognome

**tdowns** · 03-06-2009, 12:51 PM

Originally Posted by theognome

Originally Posted by tdowns

i always recommend, "a squeeze play a day."

with kids, and life, days can be crazy, so, i tell people and myself, to at least once a day, go in for the squeeze play; a long hug, with eye contact, an "i love you" and kiss.

Seems simple, but, i think many miss it and days go by without it.

good call. Every day, when i get home from work, the first thing i do is give her a very long hug, which is finished when i sigh the word, 'home!'.

Theognome

nice!

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 12:53 PM

Originally Posted by Theognome

Originally Posted by tdowns

I always recommend, "A squeeze play a day."

With kids, and life, days can be crazy, so, I tell people and myself, to at least once a day, go in for the squeeze play; a long hug, with eye contact, an "I love you" and kiss.

Seems simple, but, I think many miss it and days go by without it.

Good call. Every day, when I get home from work, the first thing I do is give her a very long hug, which is finished when I sigh the word, 'HOME!'.

Theognome

And my husband doesn't leave the house, ever, without kissing me goodbye. Little routines like that are very important. It's like a special language just for you two.

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 12:58 PM

Originally Posted by Marrow Man

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Originally Posted by Marrow Man

But Heidi, you get to be married to The Batman!

And I get to ride in the Batmobile. In case you were wondering, we've had it painted gold to blend with traffic and it has a sunroof and remote keyless entry.

But the most important question of all Heidi, is this: "Does he have Bruce Wayne's money?"

Dear Marrow Man,

I have gone through the lining of all the coat pockets and can't find Bruce Wayne's money. I did discover about seven dollars in quarters in a milk glass bowl. I think he left it for the laundry . . .

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 01:00 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Dear Marrow Man,

I have gone through the lining of all the coat pockets and can't find Bruce Wayne's money. I did discover about seven dollars in quarters in a milk glass bowl. I think he left it for the laundry . . .

I'm guessing someone's been robin you.

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 01:02 PM

You're such a joker.

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 01:03 PM

Maybe he'll buy you a penguin instead

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 01:03 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

You're such a joker.

Good one!

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 01:04 PM

Colleen, we actually did used to have a giant penguin he got me on one of our anniversaries (name of Sanballat) but we gave it to a little girl when we went to Mexico :-)

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 01:06 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Colleen, we actually did used to have a giant penguin he got me on one of our anniversaries (name of Sanballat) but we gave it to a little girl when we went to Mexico :-)

Oh that is so cool! Have pictures to post in God's Creation forum?

**a mere housewife** · 03-06-2009, 01:09 PM

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Colleen, we actually did used to have a giant penguin he got me on one of our anniversaries (name of Sanballat) but we gave it to a little girl when we went to Mexico :-)

Oh that is so cool! Have pictures to post in God's Creation forum?

I ought to have clarified that it was a giant stuffed penguin. But if you think that it would be appreciated I can post a picture of it in the God's Creation forum?

**tdowns** · 03-06-2009, 01:11 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Colleen, we actually did used to have a giant penguin he got me on one of our anniversaries (name of Sanballat) but we gave it to a little girl when we went to Mexico :-)

Oh that is so cool! Have pictures to post in God's Creation forum?

I ought to have clarified that it was a giant stuffed penguin. But if you think that it would be appreciated I can post a picture of it in the God's Creation forum?

This exchange reminded me of one related to the OPC...

Laugh together!...I'm laughing right now...lol

Not at, but with you, for a second I had the same image in my mind.

**Marrow Man** · 03-06-2009, 01:12 PM

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Maybe he'll buy you a penguin instead

And now Lady F jumps on the batmobile bandwagon. Way to be two-faced!

I could say that allusion is just riddled with errors, but I shall refrain.

I'd better shut and stop hijacking this thread or I could be eating (scare)crow.

**LadyFlynt** · 03-06-2009, 01:14 PM

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Originally Posted by LadyFlynt

Originally Posted by a mere housewife

Colleen, we actually did used to have a giant penguin he got me on one of our anniversaries (name of Sanballat) but we gave it to a little girl when we went to Mexico :-)

Oh that is so cool! Have pictures to post in God's Creation forum?

I ought to have clarified that it was a giant stuffed penguin. But if you think that it would be appreciated I can post a picture of it in the God's Creation forum?

Sure