I have a friend, who is just really miserable. She hates her self and she doesn\'t trust people. She was telling me that no one does anything loving without a selfish motive. She also was very avid about discarding emotions and trusting no one at all but God. Yes blessed are those who mourn, but she seems to be mourning to the point to where she wants to die (though she wont kill herself, she just wants to die in some Godglorifying fashion) and she doesn\'t want to marry, have kids, etc. She seems to be humble enough to change her point of view if there was scriptural warrant.

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Tim Potts
Siloam Springs, Arkansas
Member of Covenant Presbyterian Church (PCA)
Student at John Brown University
-Let the church change the world and rather than the world change the church-

Well, first of all, why is she miserable. The bible tells us to count it all joy! This is not to say that we are not sinful, falling short and at times let ourselves down to the point of grief. I guess if it is chronic, that would be a problem. Why does she hate herself? She is made in the image of God. Hating oneself is akin to hating God; after all, God made her.

As believers, our motives are tainted. However, not all of them are; she needs to understand this in light of Gods word, about Gods people and trust.

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Scott Bushey
Husband to Tina, father to Nicole, Danielle and Zoe
Member First Presbyterian Church of Margate PCA

Here is a little jewel that a dear brother on this site passed on to me in a U2U recently as he gave me great comfort concerning a conflict in my heart that relates to what your friend is experiencing:

"And if there is one thing more that I must say to you, it is this: Do not believe that he who seeks to comfort you lives untroubled among the simple and quiet words that sometimes do you good. His life has much difficulty and sadness and remains far behind yours. Were it otherwise he would never have been able to find those words."

-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet


Perhaps hers is a struggle that one day will comfort many.

[Edited on 8-30-2005 by BrianBowman]

Psalm 126

1 When the LORD brought back the captivity of Zion,
We were like those who dream.
2 Then our mouth was filled with laughter,
And our tongue with singing.
Then they said among the nations,
"œThe LORD has done great things for them."�
3 The LORD has done great things for us,
And we are glad.

4 Bring back our captivity, O LORD,
As the streams in the South.

5 Those who sow in tears
Shall reap in joy.
6 He who continually goes forth weeping,
Bearing seed for sowing,
Shall doubtless come again with rejoicing,
Bringing his sheaves with him.

Life can be a struggle sometimes - generally speaking it is hard work (at least, I find that it's hard work for me). The reality of that certainly contradicts the expectations I formed as a child thinking that Christianity = "rosey" life. But, as difficult as life seems at times to the point that if my emotions went unchecked I would almost despair, I know that I must stop focusing on myself and focus on Christ. I know that the Lord has done great things for me.

When we think that He has saved us from the bondage and wages of sin, out hearts must be gladdened.

I know that your friend might be struggling with complex issues and that this might not be helpful at all. What I've just written seems simplistic but for me, this was at the heart of dealing with a similar issue.


Matt

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Matthew Glover
Reformed Presbyterian Church of Australia