I am new to this form of relationship. What does courting practically look like? What does the Bible specifically say about kissing, touching, etc. (without saying "it says not to")? Can the couple be alone or always in groups? How do the two get to know each other?

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Rev. Andrew J. Barnes
Husband of Dena
Pastor of Tchula Presbyterian Church

IMHO, you get to know a person better, at first surely, in group settings. There's much less likely to be that "on my best behavior" facade that is so often prevalent when wanting to impress that certain someone. In group settings, your more likely to see the "real" person, their actions, and their reactions.

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Josh Hicks, Chloë's Dad
Attending CCRPC, Member of TRBC
Reformers & Puritans -lllll- Puritan Pub
Board Rules - Signature Rules - Suggestion Box

Practically speaking, I don't believe it is sinful to hold hands, kiss, hug, etc. However, encrouching along these area's could lead you into sin; is this what you want to do? It should be our heart to try and do everything possible to keep from stumbling, as well as stumbling our brothers or sisters. It should be the desire of your heart Andrew, to protect your fiance (guard her heart). You will be federal head of your household; God is looking to you to guide and protect this family; to nurture them. Your wife will hold you in high esteem later on in life knowing that you protected her, even in the initial stages of your friendship.

Tina and I did not kiss until we took our vows. This in no way hampered getting to know each other. We both served in different ministries. I knew her heart towards God; this is what is important. Is Gods word hidden in her heart and mind? What is her thoughts on children? How many does she want? Do you want? Homeschooling? Public schools? Boy or girl? Is she wanting to stay at home? Will both of you work? How is her relationship w/ her parents? Does she honor them? Do you honor yours? Money! Do you have debt? Does she? Do you even have bank accounts? So many things to go over. These are the things that you need to know. Do you trust God. If he is the one whom brought you your bride, is He not able to give you the desires of your heart? God blessed us immensly afterward for our desire to seek Him first. Not that a kiss proves one is NOT seeking him first. But admit it, could you imagine your wedding night if you held off on doing any of these things? You have the wedding itself; vows, friends, celebration. Then the evening; both you and your wife honored God by not even walking the line of possibility. Both of you are at the moment, chaste. Honorable to each other and God has indeed been in your midst. You pray before your consumation!

And then. there's your future. Your wife will always look at you as if you are a man seeking His Lord, by the grace of the HS, in control and that you have raised her up in honor to your King, thanking Him for bringing you the bride of your youth!

1Pe 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

Eph 5:24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
Eph 5:26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
Eph 5:27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
Eph 5:29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,
Eph 5:30 because we are members of his body.
Eph 5:31 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."
Eph 5:32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
Eph 5:33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.



[Edited on 8-7-2005 by Scott Bushey]

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Scott Bushey
Husband to Tina, father to Nicole, Danielle and Zoe
Member First Presbyterian Church of Margate PCA

Great advice, Scott!

women--- bah hum-bug...

when I was like twelve years-old I went through this stage where I ran out of use for women... when I got older I got enamored with girls... always had to be around 'em... I would rather hang with pretty damsels than my buddies sometimes. In my early 20s, I looked backed to that kid, and thought to myself what the heck was wrong with that kid... I like being around women!

Now, after putting up 'em and all their non-sense... Now, I look back and realize that was a smart little kid... I'd rather be single for a while than get stuck with some nagging woman who treats me like dirt, uses me, or leads me own while going out with some other guy.
:bigsmile:

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Ryan
1689 London Baptist Confession

You need a foreign woman. Preferbly from Latin America, Eastern Europe, Middleeast or South East Asia.

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~Keon Garraway~ Brooklyn, NY Member of Franklin Square OPC

Love for God demonstrated by the love for our children in giving them a God centered education is the only hope for our country. by David Morrow
Pslam 71:20 [Thou], which hast shewed me great and sore troubles, shalt quicken me again, and shalt bring me up again from the depths of the earth.