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Old 10-19-2009, 10:10 AM
SemperEruditio's Avatar
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Dealing with LIARS



It is just sooooo frustrating. It is one thing to deal with a liar who is an expert at it because you just don't know. I'm dealing with three who are flagrant about their lies. A director, supervisor, and a junior employee. At one time catching them in a lie was like trying to catch smoke but now it's like grabbing soot, which is possible. However in the end it's just lie upon lie upon lie upon lie... Nothing happens when the lie is exposed because "what's important is that the work get done..."

It's the old 80/20 rule. One thing I have noticed about the 80/20 rule is that even though 80% of the work is done by 20% of the people it is the 80% group that gets the recognition. Just way passed frustrating to see supervisors get cash awards for work they never did, ideas the never thought up, nor even showing up to work.

Please forgive me. I'm just having one of those days where the lies have gotten to be too much. I remember once upon a time when I would just rationalize that it's just the way they work but events last week and this morning are such that enough's enough!

I need to go to the gym for a bit.
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Old 10-19-2009, 10:15 AM
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I understand your frustration.

Call em.. on it.
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Old 10-19-2009, 01:45 PM
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I think you would be highly, extremely helped by the (secular) book "The sociopath next door. I am at the point where I think it is almost required reading for anybody who works with or deals with selfish, evil, heathen or family members.

Amazon Amazon
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Old 10-19-2009, 02:49 PM
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I've been there brother. Just remember Deu 32:35- "In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them."

With good providence, you'll be there to see it.
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Old 10-19-2009, 05:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MMasztal View Post
I've been there brother. Just remember Deu 32:35- "In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them."

With good providence, you'll be there to see it.
Is it not more profitable to pray and hope for restoration than destruction and judgment. Just a thought
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Old 10-19-2009, 05:28 PM
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Hi Frank,

Of course I know nothing about your situation, so forgive me if I say something that makes you angry!

Diligence and faithfulness in your work, while not always appreciated by the boss, is always pleasing to the Lord, who's your REAL boss. I imagine that the Lord is using this to produce godly characteristics in you. I know its hard when things are unfair, but its all adding up to glorifying Him.
Psa 37:1-9
(1) Of David. Fret not yourself because of evildoers; be not envious of wrongdoers!
(2) For they will soon fade like the grass and wither like the green herb.
(3) Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
(4) Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
(5) Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.
(6) He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday.
(7) Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!
(8) Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
(9) For the evildoers shall be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD shall inherit the land.



Bern
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Old 10-19-2009, 06:25 PM
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I deal with liars from both directions....I'm shop steward. I share your frustration. Little moments of satisfaction do occur when they paint themselves into a corner and I can just let them know that I know.
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Old 10-19-2009, 07:24 PM
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Force them to put their teeth on a curb and then stomp on the back of their head...

Just kidding. That's the evil thing to do, and you'll go to prison for it, if not hell. .


Really. I think you should pray and ask for guidance and try to politley get them to work by providing a good example and strategically presenting the situation to them. Somehow make the option of them doing their jobs and not backstabbing you more attractive than the alternatives.
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Old 10-19-2009, 08:46 PM
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Thanks everyone. I think the rant was what I needed because the rest of the day went fine. I was able to deal with all of them without pulling a Chuck Norris. I'm not joking with them or doing much small talk if any. Basically I'm just Frank the frank guy but I'm only frank about the work. No personal talk, no nothing that opens the door to undue familiarity. It is my suspicion that part of my problem has been I've been too transparent. They have then turned around and used my self-depracating humor against me. This then leads them to blatantly lie. In other words, a joke is taken out of context and then used as truth.

This experience is teaching me a lot. I understand now when the senior military guys would act one way in front of the troops and then "let their hair down" when away. I thought it was hypocritical but I see it is necessary. Not that it's hypocrisy but you have to be guarded because when you have a sense of humor many cannot separate between a joke and being the joke. I see it was my joking that turned around and made me the joke which then gave them liberty to treat me any old way with the ultimate disrespect of lying to me and about me.

Thanks be to the Holy and most wise God for showing me what my wife has been telling me. She and I spoke about it and first it was then

With this new found professionalism I guess I would call it, I will definitely address lies as they come up. Basically as Rich said, let them know I know.

Thanks for the help. For all those thinking about coming under-care be forewarned. All those things that were once no-brainers change.
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