Crab Poetry

North Jersey Baptist · #1 (**permalink**) 05-22-2007, 10:23 PM

I wrote this little ditty two years ago this August. I posted it on a previous thread that is now closed. Seeing as we are getting ready to enter blue crab season in the Chesapake region I thought it would be fitting to post my "Ode to the Crab" one more time:

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Ah, the delicacy of the Maryland Blue Crab. If you live near the Chesapeake Bay region of Maryland, partaking of an annual crab feast is not an option to be considered. It is very much an annual rite of passage. Succulent steamed crabs...smothered in Old Bay seasoning...it is enough to cause Pavlov's dog to have a coniption fit.

This afternoon my pastor and I sat down at Kauffman's Seafood Restaurant in Gambrills, MD. The table was covered in brown "crab" paper for protection. We were ready to engage in our feast, but Kauffman's would do its best to limit our consumption. You see this was an all-you-can-eat crab feast. One price for all the luscious, steamed, blue claw crabs you could eat. The server tried to tempt our appetite with Maryland Crab soup and sweet corn. No...we would have none of it! We demanded drawn butter, vinegar and Old Bay seasoning. I had my glass of unsweetened iced tea, and my pastor (Doug) had a coke. That was all the diversion that we would tolerate. We were salivating and ready to indulge.

Out came the crabs. Hot and juicy. We engaged these crustacean delights with reckless abandon. One could tell from a distance that we were professionals at work. First, the tender claws. There is an art to separating the upper claw from the lower claw. A proper twist and pull brings a two inch section of crab meat out of the lower claw. It is then dipped in vinegar/Old Bay and lovingly consumed. Then the upper claw is precisely cracked in order to expose a thumb size offering of meat. The appendages are carefully pulled out. If great care is exercised they may reward the eager picker with delicious meat. Finally the body of the crab is exposed. To free the meat inside, the picker cuts off the apron and the "knuckles" on each side of the body cavity. The cavity is separated and each side cut in half. The result is a joyous rapture of crab heaven. The process is then repeated on each and every crab.

When the feast is completed, the satiated pickers walk away from the table knowing that they have rescued another summer from mediocrity.

Ode to the Crab
by Bill Brown

Yea, crab..crab...Crustacean delight,
You offer us joy at your hot, steamy sight.

From claws to backfin, you beg us to take,
And revel in feasting, it is no mistake.

Poor pity the soul who does not live by the Bay,
How shall they redeem summer, can it not be saved?

They cry, "Corn, corn!" or beef on the grill,
Yet you and I know, it is comparatively swill.

The tradition is long, and has survived the years,
The feast of the Blue Claw, it has no known peer.

So hearken! I call you, make your pilgrimage sure,
To come to the Bay and stand by the shore.

To partake and enjoy of the bounty therein,
and know Blue Claw pleasure, it is no sin.

VirginiaHuguenot · #2 (**permalink**) 05-22-2007, 10:30 PM

I'd still like to "break claw" with you one of these days, brother!

P.S. Bill -- It seems like you are coming out your shell, poetically speaking.

North Jersey Baptist · #3 (**permalink**) 05-22-2007, 10:51 PM

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It seems like you are coming out your shell, poetically speaking.

Andrew - I would be honored to "break claw" with you. I know a few good places. All I need is an excuse!

July is the best month for local crabs (imho). You can get them now but they are imports from Louisiana.

satz · #4 (**permalink**) 05-22-2007, 11:57 PM

Wow.

In all honesty I still remembered that post.

And that it made me hungry.

Me Died Blue · #5 (**permalink**) 05-23-2007, 12:15 PM

Bill, how dare you create such a great stumbling block for a brother such as myself, tempting me to break the tenth commandment like that?

Seriously, great ode...being a lover of fine seafood myself, it has inspired me to make an addition to my "must try" list, since the only crabs I have had are snow and king. Is there one of those that Maryland Blue Crab is more similar to than the other?

tdowns007 · #6 (**permalink**) 05-23-2007, 12:37 PM

a taste bud stimulator!!!!

North Jersey Baptist · #7 (**permalink**) 05-23-2007, 12:50 PM

Chris, the Maryland Blue Crab has a flavor all its own. It is different than snow, king or dungeoness. The crabs are steamed in Old Bay seasoning. There is an art to picking a blue crab, but it is easily learned.

If you get up this way let me know. I'd be happy to introduce you to the blue crab.

North Jersey Baptist · #8 (**permalink**) 04-12-2008, 03:08 PM

In response to Andrew's Crab thread it is time for that annual rite of spring, the posting of the "Ode to the Crab" poem I wrote in 2005. For those of you who have not enjoyed the fellowship of the claw, you have been deprived. May this be the year that you endulge. It's a Bawb thing.

North Jersey Baptist · #9 (**permalink**) 06-29-2008, 01:03 PM

Listen children and you may hear of the afternoon feast of Bill and Doug (I know, Doug doesn't rhyme).

It's crab time folks. That's right - the Ode to the Crab will once again rescue another summer day from mediocrity. We will be feasting within the hour enjoy rich fellowship, discussing this mornings sermon and feasting on crabs. Wish you were here!

North Jersey Baptist · #10 (**permalink**) 06-29-2008, 06:30 PM

Andrew, I am still "go" to break claw with you. We can either do it privately or with the group when Rich makes it back to Virginia. Your call.

North Jersey Baptist · #11 (**permalink**) 06-29-2008, 06:34 PM

This video is poor. It was taken from my Motorola Q 9h. Doug is on the left and I am on the right. The darling blonde is his daughter. On the table in front of us is a half dozen large male crabs. The bag on my left (on the chair) has about three dozen crabs. As is our custom, Doug and I recite the "Ode to the Crab."

YouTube - Ode to the Crab