Amazing Grace (Calvin Style)

Scot · #1 (**permalink**) 08-12-2004, 10:57 PM

I found this on an arminian forum. Sad.

Amazing Grace
(Through a Calvinist's Eyes)

Amazing Fate how strange a sound
A fickle God decrees
I' ll always be lost or always saved
By nothing done by me

What "grace" is it that leaves me cold
Wondering where I stand
Either God had blessed me by His death
Or cursed me without end

The gospel pleads to one and all
Without sincerity
Then curses those who can't respond
For rejecting Calvary

Amazing Fate is the cry
Of Calvin's theology
It boasts of grace and love and peace
A gospel mockery

Not sure how to react so......

:flaming:

:no:

Me Died Blue · #2 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 12:57 AM

That's both sick and saddening. Beyond their obvious ignorance of the true nature of Reformed soteriology, do they even have any idea that "Amazing Grace" was penned by a Calvinist?! :no:

JWJ · #3 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 06:43 AM

Amazing Free Will
(Through a Arminian's Eyes)

Amazing Free Will how strange a sound
A fickle human decrees
I' ll either be lost or saved
When it come down to it is up to me

What "free will" is it that leaves me insecure
Always wondering where I stand
Either I will be blessed by His death or cursed without end
From first to last it is ultimately up to me

The gospel pleads to one and all
Cursing those who don't cooperate and blessing those who do
Who will reject Calvary?
It all depends on free will

Amazing Free will is the cry
Of Man-centered theology
It boasts of humanism, independence, and human cooperation
The ultimate gospel mockery

Joshua · #4 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 09:02 AM

Arminian Singing of his view of a little god:

[i:14208af446]Deficient Grace[/i:14208af446]--Total Depravity Terminated

On neutral ground, I'll make my choice
Detached from death in sin
Able to see iniquity
And will myself to him

FrozenChosen · #5 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 09:20 AM

[quote:98ca2903ba="JWJ"]Amazing Free Will
(Through a Arminian's Eyes)
[/quote:98ca2903ba]

It doesn't fit the tune, but that must mean we neet to change the tune. Because that's a keeper.

Me Died Blue · #6 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 01:08 PM

Great line, Josh - it even fits the tune perfectly!

Joshua · #7 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 01:43 PM

[i:112eab4b4f]Deficient Grace[/i:112eab4b4f]--Unconditional Election Conditioned

Verse 2:

Twas grace that made me savable
But did not make it sure
It took my will to make it real
And it may not endure

Craig · #8 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 02:11 PM

Josh...I think you found your new calling!

Is it just me, or isn't it true that Calvinists tend to be funnier than Arminians?

Joshua · #9 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 02:13 PM

[i:fc61f288b8]Deficient Grace[/i:fc61f288b8]--Limited Atonement Limited

Verse 3:

The blood he shed, he shed for all
A mere symbol of his love
Held no real pow'r in of itself
Just vain hope from up above

Joshua · #10 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 02:41 PM

[quote:fdab111e79="Craig"]Josh...I think you found your new calling!

Is it just me, or isn't it true that Calvinists tend to be funnier than Arminians?[/quote:fdab111e79] In my case, just funnier looking!

Joshua · #11 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 03:44 PM

[i:8aef5464bb]Deficient Grace[/i:8aef5464bb]--Irresistible Grace Resisted

Verse 4:

This god is but a gentleman
Not wanting to intrude
We have rejected o'er and o'er
While he, for us, has wooed

Joshua · #12 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 04:00 PM

[i:f3bebd3e8c]Deficient Grace[/i:f3bebd3e8c]--Perseverance of the Saints Perished

Verse 5:

I willed myself to be redeemed
On one of my smart days
So if I sin badly enough
I'll probably fall away

or

Though he's big enough to justify
And hold me in his hand
I'm strong enough to leave his grip
And thwart his pseudo-plan

or

Fill in the Blank

Me Died Blue · #13 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 04:26 PM

Great work Josh! That was fast, too!

JohnV · #14 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 05:06 PM

Again, though, notice how it is not the Calvinism that we believe in that is being criticised; They are doing nothing but criticizing their own notions of what it is: criticizing their own inventions.

Though I think, Josh, that you are talented, it has to be said that we have to be careful not to criticize our own inventions as well. You can take Calvinism as a whole, a system, but you can't do that with Arminianism. It is as individual, as a system, as each person holding to it. Because it is not truly a Scriptural system, it really can't be any other way.

Joshua · #15 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 06:25 PM

[quote:8e21bb25cb="JohnV"]...Josh...it has to be said that we have to be careful not to criticize our own inventions as well. You can take Calvinism as a whole, a system, but you can't do that with Arminianism. It is as individual, as a system, as each person holding to it. Because it is not truly a Scriptural system, it really can't be any other way.[/quote:8e21bb25cb]

Yes, Sir. Most definitely. Just havin' some fun...

JohnV · #16 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 06:39 PM

I was a member of a church in which the members, minister included, thought it entertaining to poke fun at everyone else's views on theology. At first I thought it kind of innocent fun, but it got to be that it was really an indication of the lack of respect they had for other people as people. There was no love there; it was more that anyone who wasn't one of us was fair game. I just had too much of that, that's all. I didn't mean to pick on you.

Craig · #17 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 07:02 PM

There's nothing wrong with using humor to point out an inconsistency.

The difference between [i:f5162c3ea9]mocking someone[/i:f5162c3ea9] and using satire is huge: while we do need to be careful we're not mocking, I do think you're in no danger of crossing that line with your song, Josh. Good stuff!

Scot · #18 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 07:12 PM

Here's another one from the same site.

CALVIN, THE SOLID ROCK

A parody

VERSE:
My hope is built on nothing less,
Than Calvin's notes and references,
I dare not lean on Scripture truth,
But wholly trust the Institutes!

CHORUS:
On Calvin's flower I will stand,
All bothered by free-will of man,
All bothered by free-will of man!

VERSE:
The Institutes are my sole rule,
For proper thought in Sunday school,
I will not take the Scripture stance,
For Fatalism takes no chance!

CHORUS:
Five Points are all I need,
No other facts will I concede,
No other facts will I concede!

VERSE:
If Servetus had any hope,
He'd have to bow to Reformed pope
In Calvin's own theology,
You're justly torched if disagreed!

CHORUS:
All heretics shall be burned,
All mercy to them shall be spurned,
All mercy to them shall be spurned!

VERSE:
The loveless grace of Calvin's band,
Is limited by where you stand,
Arminians they do berate,
As subjects of their "Christian" hate

CHORUS:
Christ does not save all you see,
Just those of us, who will agree,
With Calvin's own theology!

Authorised · #19 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 08:20 PM

I guess the poetry is getting a little better...

certainly not the theology.

Authorised · #20 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 08:27 PM

In an unrelated rabbit trail...

Has everyone had just about enough of people posting their own poetry in their blogs and AIM profiles? These hyper-depressed writers who think they're the reincarnation of Shakespeare when they're actually rather lame? Drives me nuts. Anyway, I see nothing wrong with mocking false religion; and no, I do not have the Elijah syndrome.

Hey, at least we're not killing them...

Joshua · #21 (**permalink**) 08-13-2004, 09:04 PM

[quote:42b551c36b="JohnV"]I was a member of a church in which the members, minister included, thought it entertaining to poke fun at everyone else's views on theology. At first I thought it kind of innocent fun, but it got to be that it was really an indication of the lack of respect they had for other people as people. There was no love there; it was more that anyone who wasn't one of us was fair game. I just had too much of that, that's all. I didn't mean to pick on you.[/quote:42b551c36b]

I don't feel picked upon, Sir. I [u:42b551c36b][i:42b551c36b][b:42b551c36b]always[/u:42b551c36b][/i:42b551c36b][/b:42b551c36b] appreciate your words (and friendship). They're invaluable to me.