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Your post was timely. It reminded me of a few things, namely that to love God I must hate sin.
James 4:4 do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God?
Intimacy comes through pain. It also accentuates joy. There were parts of your post that reminded me of John Piper's book, "Desiring God." We are most happy in life when we are most satisfied with God. The Psalmist wrote:
Psalm 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
If God is my portion then I can truly say:
Job 1:21 The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD.
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